Where have you gone?

It seems that when I write I always try and present answers. A friend at work always says to me "you always have to be right don't you Josh?" This confused me at first as I'll happily admit when I'm wrong and wont try and argue my point. It made more sense to me when I realised how I always strive for answers. For my problems, my questions, others peoples questions and problems, I like to think I can figure it all out. I can't.

One question on my mind right now, where has G-d gone?

It seems that me and many of my friends are struggling at the moment with feeling like G-d's distant, friends with strong relationships with Him feel like they can't connect there anymore. So has G-d just dissapeared? I don't think so, but I don't know what He's doing. I don't have to know, He's G-d, who am I to question Him. I'd rather just trust Him. He is good! He is love! He is everything!

Space

If time didn't fill up so fast my posts here would be longer and more frequent. I hate the rush of life right now, it does more than cause me to run for busses or wolf down my breakfast, it clouds my mind. I forget things, I mess up things and that seems to be getting me in to a lot of trouble at the moment. Worst of all I just can't prioritise, I struggle to pray and I can't really evaluate my perception on the important things because I can't understand it, I can't order my thoughts, it's all just a cloudy mess.
I miss long walks, I miss sitting and reading or praying or thinking or listening to music or chatting or just being. I miss being and am sick of all this doing.
G-d cut through the cloud, give me space, give me light.
Shalom.

Ocean

I am terrified when I think upon the vastness of the ocean, I am reminded most assuredly of my own inferiority. How small I am in comparison, how easily I could be swallowed up, yet I feel compelled to jump in, my arms spread wide, hoping somehow to hold it and to be held within.

"A fish swims in the sea yet the sea is in a certain sense contained within the fish. Oh what am I to think of what the writings of a thousand lifetimes could not explain if all the forest trees were pens and all the oceans ink?"